- I wonder why I haven’t heard back from my professor yet about my book?
- Come on, Sarah, it’s only been, like, two hours. Give him time to get through traffic and get home, for crying out loud.
- Duh, of course. I’m being unreasonable.
- [a day passes]
- OK, but I would have expected, like, a text or something by now indicating something that he liked or, like, marking the number of times that he’s already cried. Maybe I’m too much of a Debbie downer? Maybe I was even snarkier and more obnoxious than I remember and it makes reading painful?
- Sarah, it’s fine. He told you once he’s a slow reader, remember? Plus, dude’s on sabbatical, has family that he enjoys spending time with, and a life. Plus, it was a really nice weekend. The world doesn’t revolve around you!
- (sigh) You’re right, you’re right, I know you’re right.
- [two days pass]
- Shit. Shit. Shit.
- What now? For crying out loud. Get it together.
- It’s just that…he’s clearly discovered that I’m an impostor and he’s trying to find the nicest way to tell me that I am fundamentally incapable of doing theology.
- I don’t think so, he seems to genuinely think you’re smart.
- No, for real. You wrote a lot, and it’s only been three days.
- Three and a half. Almost four. And he said he was going to read it right away.
- Seriously, get a grip, Sarah. He’s got other things to do.
- Maybe I should email him? Joke about whether or not he regrets agreeing to grant me a degree?
- Oh, please don’t. No one likes the smell of a desperate approval-seeker.
- (sniff) Is that what that is? I thought it was just my new deodorant…Do you think this is weirdly passive aggressive, or charmingly vulnerable and honest?
- It’s hard to tell. I give up.
- No, wait! I didn’t mean to make you mad! Come back!